"Dear Aunt Sophie" joke

Dear Aunt Sophie,
My boyfriend just won't leave me in peace for a minute. He does it to me all the time no matter what I am doing. When I am ironing, he lays me across the ironing board and I've got burn marks on my knees to prove it. When I am cooking, he lays me across the kitchen table and does it. I've got knife wounds in my bum to prove it. Please excuse my shaky handwriting.

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