Worry Jokes / Recent Jokes

Liz: I get so nervous and frightened during driving tests!
Doctor: Don't worry about it. You'll pass eventually.
Liz: I'm the examiner!

There are only two things to worry about. Either you are sick or you are well. If you are well, there is nothing to worry about. But if you re sick, there are two things to worry about. Either you live or you die. If you live there is nothing to worry about. But if you die there are two things to worry about. Either you go to heaven or you go to hell. If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about. But if you go to hell, you'll be so busy greeting old friends you won't have time to worry!

Liz: I get so nervous and frightened during driving tests! Doctor: Don't worry about it. You'll pass eventually.Liz: I'm the examiner!

Once A Lane Of Houses Were Being Demolished So A Person Came To Santa-Banta And Told Them That The Houses Were Being Demolished. On This They Said That Why Should They Worry For That. The Man Told Them That Their House Was Also Being Demolished. To This They Replied That Then Why Should He Worry For That?

Some people have the misconception that cats never have to be bathed. That somehow they "lick" themselves clean. Well contrary to this popular belief, cats do NOT have some enzyme in their saliva that resembles Tide (with or without bleach).Cats, like their nemesis, the dog, do get dirty and have a variety of odors, from smelling like the outhouse where you camped last year to the same odor as your dog's breath. (Remember, your dog will try to eat anything.) Now we all know that cats HATE water. And we know that giving the cat a sedative to ease this process of a bath is out of the question.So, the best approach is both sneaky and direct. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits.Although your cat has the advantage of smarts, quickness and total lack of concern for you, you have the advantage of size, strength, and the ability to wear protective garments.1. First, dress for the occasion. A 4-ply rubber wet suit is more...

Worry is like a rocking chair; it keeps you busy, but gets you nowhere.

The husband and wife were playing on the ninth green when she collapsed from a heart attack. “Please dear, I need help. ” she said. The husband ran off saying “I’ll go get some help. ” A little while later he returned, picked up his club and began to line up his shot on the green. His wife, on the ground, raised up her head and said, “I may be dying and you’re putting? ” “Don’t worry, dear. I found a doctor on the second hole. He said he will come and help you. ” “The second hole??? When in the world is he coming??? ” “I told you not to worry, ” he said, practice stroking his putt…. ”Everyone’s already agreed to let him play through. ”