Steak Jokes / Recent Jokes

Bad waiter A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy" yelled the customer, "sticking your thumb in my steak?!"
"What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"

A guy told a group of his friends about the fantastic steak he had eating in a downtown restaurant the day before. They all decided to head down to the restaurant to see if it was really as great as he was making it out to be.
The group entered the restaurant and were seated at a table in the back section. After looking over the menu, they ordered and anxiously awaited their delicious, gigantic steaks.
To their collective disappointment, the waitress brought them the smallest steaks they had ever seen.
Embarrassed, the guy called the waitress over and said, "Now listen here! Yesterday I came in here and you brought me the biggest, juiciest, most delicious steak I have ever had. Today, when I have all my friends here, you serve us these miniature steaks. What is the meaning of this?"
"Yesterday, sir, you were sitting by the window!" replied the waitress.

A guy had told all of his friends about the great steak he'd eaten downtown the day before. A group of them decided to head down and see if it was really as large and delicious as he was making it out to be.The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After looking over the menu, they ordered and waited, hungrily, for their large, delicious, gigantic steaks.To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out some of the smallest steaks they'd ever seen."Now see here," the very embarrassed guy said to the waiter. "Yesterday, when I came down here you served me a big, juicy steak. Today, though, when I have my friends with me, you serve tiny steaks! What is the meaning of this?""Yes, sir," replied the waiter, "yesterday you were sitting by the window."

Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?A: Because it's in the ground state.

The Bachelor DietMondayBreakfast - Who can eat Breakfast on a Monday? Swallowsome toothpaste while brushing your teethLunch - Send your secretary out for six "gutbombers"- those little hamburgers that used to cost a dime butnow cost sixty five cents. Also order French fries, abowl of chilli, a soft drink and have her stop on theway back for a family size bottle of maalox. Afternoon Snack - Drink the maaloxDinner - Six pack of beer and Kentucky fried chickenthree-piece Dinner, don't eat the coleslaw. TuesdayBreakfast - Eat the coleslawLunch - Go to the office vending machine and put ninetyfive cents in and close your eyes, push a button and eatwhatever comes out swallowing it whole to prevent nausea. Dinner - Four tacos and a pitcher of Sangria at El Flasho's. WednesdayBreakfast - Jaws couldn't eat Breakfast after a night atEl Flasho'sLunch - Rolaids and a cokeDinner - Drop in at a married friends house and beg forscrapsThursdayBreakfast - Order out for pizzaLunch - Your more...

One day, a truck driver who had been on the road for hours on end, decided to stop at a diner and have some lunch. So he goes into the diner, famished. He walks up to the counter and sits down.
"Waiter, can I have a big juicy steak and a loaded baked potato?
"Sure." says the waiter.
About 15 or 20 minutes later, the guy gets his food. About that time, a biker gang comes into the diner. They walk straight to the guy. The leader says "That's a mighty good looking steak you got there."
"Yes, it is." says the man.
"Mind letting me have it?" says the biker guy.
The truck driver doesn't even respond. He just gets up and walks off.
Biker says to the waiter, "He didn't have much of a backbone did he?"
The waiter says, "Nope. And he's not a good driver either, he just knocked over 10 motorcycles!"

A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat."Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?""What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"