Religiously Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Traditional: Farm animal must be killed by ritual slaughterer using a sharply honed knife that must not have a single nick on its blade.
    Reform: Farm animal must be told that it has the right to an attorney.
    Traditional: Will not combine meat with milk.
    Reform: Will not combine meat with chocolate milk.
    Traditional: One set of dishes for meat, another set for dairy.
    Reform: One set of dishes exclusively for cheeseburgers.
    Traditional: Hire "shabbos goy" to perform religiously prohibited tasks.
    Reform: Hire "Orthodox Jew" to perform religiously required tasks.
    Traditional: Try to concentrate on prayers, achieve sense of being in the presence of the divine.
    Reform: Try to figure out when to stand up, when to sit down, and what page everyone is on.
    Traditional: Women required to sit in synagogue balcony, apart from men.
    Reform: Women and men sit together, davening suggestively.
    Traditional: Strong disapproval of women more...

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