Minnie Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    As Mickey and Minnie were before the judge in divorce court, the judge looked at Mickey and said, "Listen here, Mr. Mouse, I cannot grant you a divorce from Minnie."
    "But why not, Your Honor?" a stunned Mickey asked.
    "I have reviewed all the information you submitted to the court and I can find no evidence to support the allegation that she's crazy," explained the judge.
    "Your Honor," Mickey exclaimed, "I didn't say she was 'crazy', I said she was fucking Goofy."

    Donald Duck and Minnie Mouse were up in a hotel room and decided that they wanted to have sex. Well, the first thing Minnie asks is, "Do you have a condom?"
    Donald says "No."
    Minnie tells Donald that if he doesn't get a condom that they can't have sex and suggests to Donald that he go buy a condom. She says that maybe they sell them at the front desk.
    Donald proceeds to go downstairs and gets to the front desk. He asks the hotel clerk if they sell condoms. The clerk says "yes we do" and pulls one out from under the desk and gives it to Donald.
    The clerk asks "Would you like me to put that on your bill?"

    Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse.

    Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. "I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane..."

    Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was mentally insane, I said that she's fucking goofy!"

    BACKUP - What you do when you run over a coon in the woods BAR CODE - Them's the fight'n rules down at the local tavern BUG - The reason you give for calling out sick CACHE - Neede when you run out of food stamps CHIP - Pasture muffins that you try not to step in TERMINAL - Time to call the undertaker CRASH - When you go to Juniors party univited DIGITAL - The art of countining on you fingers DISKETTE - Female Disco dancer FAX - What you lie about to the IRS HACKER - Uncle Leroy after 32 years of smoking HARDCOPY - Picture looked at when selecting tattoos INTERNET - Where cafeteria workers put ther hair KEYBOARD - Where you hang the keys to the John Deere MAC - Big Bubba's favorite fast food MEGAHERTZ - How your head feels after 17 beers MODEM - What ya did when the grass and weeds got too tall MOUSE PAD - Where Mickey and Minnie lives ONLINE - Where to stay when taking the sobriety test ROM - Where the pope lives INTERNET - Where cafeteria workers put ther hair KEYBOARD - Where you more...

    Minnie: Would you punish someone for something they didn't do?

    Teacher: Of course not.

    Minnie: Good,' cause I haven't done my homework.

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