Manger Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    For those of you that might not have heard the REAL story of Christmas, enjoy!
    And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) And all went to be taxed, everyone into his own city.
    And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David) To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
    And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should deliver. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
    And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and more...

    The Naming of JesusA group of biblical scholars were involved in a heated discussion about how Jesus of Nazareth was named. How did he become known as the Messiah, or Christ. One of the scholars argued that the name was a Greek corruption of Aramaic, and purists and fundamentalists ought to use the name Joshua. Another argued that Joshua was Hebrew, not Aramaic, to which a third argued that Hebrew should be used because Jesus was said to be the King of the Jews. The debate went on and on and became more and more sophisticated and obtuse. Finally, an old man known for his wisdom intervened. He informed the group that he knew how Jesus was named. When Jesus was born, a star shown in the sky, and three wise men from the East travelled to Bethlehem. They had travelled for days, suffered great deprivation, and when they finally got to Bethlehem got lost trying to find the manger. Finally, after much ado, and in rather foul moods, they reached the manger and entered the stall. As one of more...

    And Joseph went up from Galilee to Bethlehem with Mary, his espoused
    wife, who was great with child. And she brought forth a son and wrapped
    him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger because there was no
    room for them in the inn. And the angel of the Lord spoke to the shepherds
    and said, "I bring you tidings of great joy. Unto you is born a Savior,
    which is Christ the Lord."
    "There's a problem with the angel," said a Pharisee who happened to be
    strolling by. As he explained to Joseph, angels are widely regarded as
    religious symbols, and the stable was on public property where such symbols
    were not allowed to land or even hover.
    "And I have to tell you, this whole thing looks to me very much like a
    Nativity scene," he said sadly. "That's a no-no, too." Joseph had a bright
    idea. "What if I put a couple of reindeer over there near the ox and ass?"
    he said, eager to avoid more...

    And Joseph went up from Galilee to Bethlehem with Mary, his
    espoused wife, who was great with child. And she brought forth a
    Son and wrapped Him in swaddling clothes and laid Him in a manger
    because there was no room for them in the inn.

    And the angel of the Lord spoke to the shepherds and said, "I
    bring you tidings of great joy. Unto you is born a Savior, which
    is Christ the Lord."

    "There's a problem with the angel, said a Pharisee, who happened
    to be strolling by.

    As he explained to Joseph, angels are widely regarded as religious
    symbols, and the stable was on public property, where such symbols
    were not allowed to land, or even hover. "And I have to tell you,
    this whole thing looks to me very much like a Nativity scene, he
    said sadly. "That's a no-no, too.

    Joseph had a bright idea, "What if I put a couple of reindeer over
    there near the ox and the ass? he more...

    For those of you that might not have heard the REAL story of Christmas, enjoy!
    And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) And all went to be taxed, everyone into his own city.
    And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David) To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
    And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should deliver. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
    And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the more...

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