Los Angeles Jokes

Doctors in Los Angeles have successfully separated 10-month-old conjoined twins Regina and Renata Salinas Fierros. The decision could not have been an easy one for the girls' parents. These operations always entail certain risks. Plus, leaving them together would have given them a better shot at their own reality show.

L.A. Mayor Villaraigosa apologized to Muslim leaders who accused him of taking Israel's side in the war in Lebanon. "Folks, it behooves us all to remember that terrorists have feelings, too."

Joaquin Phoenix stated yesterday that he doesn't care if there are new restrictions on water usage. Whether the city likes it or not, he will continue to shower once a week.

JonBenet Ramsey murder suspect John Mark Karr arrived in Los Angeles after being flown business class from Thailand. A regretful Karr said that on reflection, confessing to the crime was probably not worth the double miles.