Lifesavers Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A teacher was doing a study testing the senses of first graders,
    using a bowl of Lifesavers.
    The children began to say:
    "Red... cherry,"
    "Yellow... lemon,"
    "Green... lime,"
    "Orange... orange,"
    Finally the teacher gave them all honey Lifesavers.
    After eating them none of the children could identify the taste.
    "Well," he said, "I'll give you all a clue; It's what your mother may
    sometimes call your father."
    One little girl looked up in horror, spit her Lifesaver out and yelled:
    "Oh, my God! They're assholes!!!

    A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of Lifesaver candies and said, "Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons, and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored Lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. "I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your mommy and daddy probably call each other all the time." Instantly, Lil' Johnnie coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Spit 'em out! Spit 'em out! They're assholes!!"

    A man was doing a study of children's senses in a first-grade class using a bowl of Lifesavers. He gave the children all the same kind of Lifesaver and asked them, "What is the flavor, and what color is it?" The children began to say, "Red... cherry... yellow... lemon... lime... green... orange... orange."
    Finally, he gave them all honey Lifesavers. The children suck on them for a while, but can't decipher the taste. "Well," he said, "I'll give you a clue. It's what your mother would call your father."
    One little girl looked up in horror, spit hers out, and yelled: "Everybody spit it out, they're assholes!"

    A teacher was working with a group of underprivileged children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory exploration. With their eyes closed, they would feel objects from pumicestones to pine cones and smell aromatic herbs and exotic fruits. Then one day, the teacher brought in a great variety of lifesavers, more flavors than you could ever imagine." Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these,"announced the teacher. Without difficulty, they managed to identifythe taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacherhad them put honey flavored lifesavers in their mouths, every oneof the children was stumped." I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something yourDaddy and Mommy probably call each other all the time." Instantly, one of the children spat the lifesaver out of his mouthand shouted, "Spit' em out, you guys, they're assholes!"

    A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their
    horizons through sensory exploration. With their eyes closed, they would
    feel objects from pumice stones to pine cones and smell aromatic herbs
    and exotic fruits.
    Then one day, the teacher brought in a great variety of lifesavers, more
    flavor than you could ever imagine. "Children, I'd like you to close
    your eyes and taste these," announced the teacher. Without difficulty,
    they managed to identify the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when
    the teacher had them put honey flavored lifesavers in their mouths, every
    one of the children was stumped.
    "I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your Daddy and
    Mommy probably call each other all the time."
    Instantly, one of the children spat the lifesaver out of his mouth and
    shouted, "Spit' em out, you guys, they're assholes!"

  • Recent Activity