Graduation Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Collegian was deeply in love with a foreign girl,
whom he wanted to marry, but he did not have the
courage to talk to her in person. so he decided to
go home and with the aid of a dictionary, wrote a
letter of proposal to her.
this is what he wrote. .....
my darling
most worthy of your estimation, after a long
consideration and much meditation, i have a strong
inclination to become your relation.
as to my educational qualification, it is no
exaggeration or fabrication, that i have passed my
matriculation, no doubt without any hesitation and
very little concentrated preparation. what you say
to the solemnization of our marriage celebration
according to the population of the present generation.
on your approbation of this application,
i shall make preparation to improve my situation,
and if such obligation is worthy of consideration
and commiseration, it will be an augmentation of more...

Headline: "Half of U.S. High Schools Require Some Study for Graduation"

You know our education system has problems when Hallmark comes out with a new line of "Easy-to-read" graduation cards.

In June 2004, George Washington University president Stephen Trachtenberg delivered some remarks at the annual graduation ceremony. "If anybody has a mortarboard, you can move your tassels from right to left, right to left," he advised, "which is what I hope happened to your politics in the last four years."

It's graduation day, and everybody's going to get their diploma but Jon. At the assembly, the entire senior class stands up and shouts' Let Jon graduate, let Jon graduate!' The principal agrees to give Jon one last chance.' If I have five apples in my right hand and five in my left hand, Jon, how many apples do I have?' he asked. Jon thought long and hard and then said:' Ten.' And the entire senior class stood up and shouted' Give Jon another chance. Give Jon another chance!'