Goal Jokes

A goal without a plan is just a wish.

Two gay men walk into a Room, Followed by a straight guy.
"Hey how you doin Man, Im Tom and this is my pal gerry!
"Nice to meet you fellas! Im Bill.
"So uh! Me and gerry came up with this game you wanna play.
"Uh sure says Bill how?
A FART IS A FILED GOAL
A BIRP IS A TOUCHDOWN
GO!
TOM:FARTS= FIELD Goal
Gerry: Burps=Touchdown
Bill:Farts=BLOCKED

Q: What do you get when you cross a French horn player with a goal post?
A: A goal post that can`t march.

Q: How many French horn players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one, but he`ll spend two hours checking the bulb for alignment and leaks.

Q: What do you get when you cross a French Horn player and a goalpost?
A: A goalpost that can`t march.

Q: How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?
A: Put your hand in the bell and miss a lot of notes.

Q: How do horn players traditionally greet each other?
A: "Hi. I did that piece in junior high."

Q: How many French horn players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one, but he`ll spend two hours checking the bulb for alignment and leaks.

Q: How do you get your viola section to sound like the horn section?
A: Have them miss every other note.

Q: What is the difference between a French horn more...

Why did the goal post get angry? Because the bar was rattled!

A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret? Yes, the professor ansvered. When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was off-side. But the referee did not se it so, and the goal won us the match. I regret that now. Well, said the gatekeeper. That is a very minor sin. You may enter. Thank you very much, Saint Peter, the professor ansvered. Im am not Saint Peter, said the gatekeeper. He is having his lunchbreak. I am Saint Lucas.