Dipped Jokes / Recent Jokes

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on 'Observation'. He took out a jar of yellow-colored liquid.
"This", he explained to the class, "is urine. In order to be a doctor, you must be observant to color, smell, sight, and taste."
After saying this, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched on in amazement, most, in disgust. But, being the good students that they were, the jar was passed around and, one by one, they dipped one finger into the jar jar and then put it into their mouth.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "Had any of you been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on 'Observation'.
He took out a jar of yellow-colored liquid. "This", he explained, "is
urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant to colour, smell,
sight and taste."
After saying this, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into
his mouth. His class watched on in amazement, most, in disgust.
But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed,
and one by one, they dipped one finger into the jar and then put
it into their mouth.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If
anyof you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put
my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."

Two drunk, Santa and Banta, were walking along a dirt road one day when they came upon a pile of some brown stuff on the ground.
"Is that shit, Banta?" Santa said.
"I don`t really know." Responded Banta as he bent over, "it smells like shit."
Santa leaned in and dipped his finger into the mysterious pile. "It feels like shit!"
Banta too dipped his finger into the mysterious pile and without hesitation shoved the finger in his mouth. "Sure tastes like shit, buddy! I think it`s definitely shit."
"Hooooeee!" Responded Santa, "Good thing we didn’t step in it!"

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river.

When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

Again, the seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the more...

A lecturer teaching medicine was tutoring a class on `Observation`. He took out a jar of yellow-colored liquid. "This", he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant to color, smell, sight, and taste."
After saying this, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched on in amazement, most, in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped one finger into the jar and then put it into their mouth.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my 2nd finger into the jar and my 3rd finger into my mouth."

One Sunday morning a minister and a choirboy were getting the church ready for mass. The minister prepared his sermon while the choirboy filled the holy water fountain. Suddenly, the choirboy burst into the minister's room and yelled, "father father, I just saw the most amazing thing! I filled the holy water fountain. Then a man came in on crutches. He moved to the fountain, dipped his left hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his left crutch. Then he dipped his right hand in the holy water, blessed himself and threw away his right crutch. Then he turned to me. .. and he took a step forward"! The minister was awe struck by what he just heard. "My boy, he said, you just witnessed a miracle from God! Where's this man now?" The Choirboy replies..."flat on his face in front of the holy water fountain"!

It is recounted that at King's College in the Strand around the time of the war, the Chief of Services would inevitably begin the year's rounds by teaching "a singularly important principle of medicine." He asked a nurse to fetch him a sample of urine. He then talked at length about diabetes mellitus. "Diabetes," he said, "is a greek name; but the Romans noticed that the bees like the urine of diabetics, so they added the word mellitus which means sweet as honey. Well, as you know, you may find sugar in the urine of a diabetic..."By now, the nurse had returned with a sample of urine which the registrar promptly held up like a trophy. We stared at that straw colored fluid as if we had never seen such a thing before. The registrar then startled us. He dipped a finger boldly into the urine, then licked his finger with the tip of his tongue. As if tasting wine, he opened and closed his lips rapidly. Could he perhaps detect a faint taste of sugar? The sample more...