Cute Jokes / Recent Jokes
A woman is out looking for a pet, and so she's trying the local pet shops. She walks into a small pet shop and explains her need to the attendant. He thinks for a moment and then says, "I've got just the thing for you madam. I'll just get him." With that, he disappears into the back of the shop, and returns a few seconds later with a cute little puppy. "This dog is a special dog," he tells her. "It is able to fly," he explains, and with that throws the dog into the air. It immediately begins to float gracefully around the shop. "There is one problem with him, however. Whenever you say' my', he'll eat whatever you've mentioned. Watch. "My apple!" The lady watches in astonishment as the dog zooms over to the shop attendant and furiously devours an apple he has produced from his pocket. "He's cute, and so unusual. I'll take him," she says, and a few minutes later she is on her way back home with dog to show her husband. more...
Q. Why did the canibal refuse to eat the clown?
A. Because he tasted funny!
The bar room was crowded. All of a sudden, the cute little thing on the stool began to cry.
The barkeep asked, "What's the trouble, Toots?"
She sobbed, "I'm a virgin, and my boyfriend won't have anything to do with inexperienced stuff. What should I do?"
Three men and a Lesbian were killed in the rush.
A woman is out looking for a pet, and so she's trying the local pet shops. She walks into a small pet shop and explains her need to the attendant. He thinks for a moment and then says, "I've got just the thing for you madam. I'll just get him."
With that, he disappears into the back of the shop, and returns a few seconds later with a cute little puppy. "This dog is a special dog," he tells her. "It is able to fly," he explains, and with that throws the dog into the air. It immediately begins to float gracefully around the shop.
"There is one problem with him, however. Whenever you say' my', he'll eat whatever you've mentioned. Watch. "My apple!" The lady watches in astonishment as the dog zooms over to the shop attendant and furiously devours an apple he has produced from his pocket.
"He's cute, and so unusual. I'll take him," she says, and a few minutes later she is on her way back home with dog to show her more...
Why do humming birds Humm???
Because they forgot the words to their faveriot song
1. Apple's stock only rose 25% last week.
2. Bill Gates's birthday now a paid holiday for Apple employees.
3. Default Mac startup sound changed to "Taps."
4. Wall Street brokers have stopped using Apple stock certificates as toilet paper.
5. Apple's new slogan: "Almost as good as Windows!"
6. Apple has been bent over with its pants dropped for so long now, even a geek like Bill Gates was bound to get lucky.
7. Cute rainbow-colored apple now inhabited by cute rainbow-colored worm.
8. Microsoft comes out with an operating system incorporating Mac technology... uh, wait a minute...
9. Phone and utilities mysteriously start working again at Apple's corporate HQ.
10. Steve Jobs seen tending bar at the Gates' private lawn party.
11. Diners in Microsoft's staff cafeteria can now enjoy their apple pie purely for its wholesome goodness and no longer as a symbolic act of global domination.
12. Unsold Newtons used as cobblestones in more...