Clinton Jokes / Recent Jokes

Bill Clinton calls his secretary in to his office and says, "Would you like to see my clock?" His secretary looks confused and says,
"What?"
"C'mon," says Bill, "it's a yes or no question."
Okay?" says the secretary. Bill then yanks his pants down, exposing his knob.
"That isn't a clock," says his secretary,"it's a cock."
To which Bill replies, "Put a face and two hands on it and it's a clock."

Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.

Q: How can you tell Bill Clinton from a bunch of dead bodies? A: He's the stiff one.

Sing it, it sounds better.....
His baloney has a first name:
It's " I did not inhale."
His baloney has a second name:
" I wasn't getting tail."
He loves to sling it every day,
The White House people all just say,
That Billy Clinton has a way
Of making bullshit sound OK!

A question for Bill Clinton:"What was Miss Lewinsky's most memorable feature?""She has the whitest teeth I've ever come across"

Bill Clinton died and arrived at the Pearly Gates. "Who goes there?" asked St. Peter.
"It's me, St. Peter, Bill Clinton," Bill replied.
"Tell me what bad things you did on earth," instructed St. Peter.
Clinton pondered things for a moment and replied, "Well, I did smoke marijuana, but that shouldn't be held against me because I didn't inhale. I suppose I did have some affairs, but that shouldn't be held against me because no one called them affairs. I did lie, but I didn't commit perjury."
After several moments of deliberation, St. Peter replied, "OK, Mr. Clinton, here's what we're going to do. We are going to send you somewhere where it's very hot, but we won't call it 'Hell'. You will be there for an indefinite period of time, but we won't call it 'eternity'. Do not 'abandon all hope' upon entering, but don't hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over!"

Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Two--One to promise he'll do it better than anyone else and one to obscure the issues.