Bahamas Jokes

Diary of her six day Bahamas cruise DEAR DIARY. .. DAY ONE I am all packed and ready to get on the cruise ship. I've packed all my pretty dresses and make-up. I'm really excited.

DEAR DIARY. . DAY TWO

We spent the entire day at sea. It was beautiful and we saw some whales and dolphins. What a wonderful vacation this has started to be. I met the Captain today and he seems like a very nice man.

DEAR DIARY. .. DAY THREE
I spent some time in the pool today. I also did some shuffle boarding and hit some golf balls off the deck. The Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. I felt honored and we had a wonderful time. He is a very attractive and attentive gentleman.
DEAR DIARY. .. DAY FOUR
Went to the ship's casino. did OK. .. won about $80. The Captain invited me to have dinner with him in his state room. We had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night, but I declined. I told him there more...

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one."
"Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone.
In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.
"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says,"I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral of story: always let your boss have the first say.

Greetings everyone from Nassau! Not county, silly geese, the island in the Bahamas! This is a special island, because you can get rum cheap AND you can get bored in under 2 minutes!
But wait, it’s hot! Really hot! Like space-shuttle-with-faulty-panels hot.
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Greetings everyone from Nassau! Not county, silly geese, the island in the Bahamas! This is a special island, because you can get rum cheap AND you can get bored in under 2 minutes!
But wait, it’s hot! Really hot! Like space-shuttle-with-faulty-panels hot.
Maybe Mr. Black-as-a-Bob-Marley-album taxi driver can give you a ride to a beach for $6/person which is walking distance away?! “It’s a deal mon!" Just for you and da famil-ee! I show you da sites! The aqua colored water, the palm trees, the big pink hotel! Ooooooooooo!!!! Holy shit mon!! Statue of Liberty who? Empire State Building wha?? You guys have a casino? Wow!!! Hey mon, you got yet them crazy inventions down here on da island known as air conditioning or deodorant?
Luckily you can get souvenirs! These islands specialize in t-shirts, 25 for $10, hmmmm, is that a scam? I dunno. They’re not gonna shrink are they? “Oh nooooo mon! Dey won't shrink.” Please, I bought one once. An XL. I got back to my more...