"Friends and Enemies" joke

ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION:You'll be making under $6 an hour.- - - - -"ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION IN AN UP-AND-COMING COMPANY":You're paid under $6 an hour; we'll be bankrupt in a year.- - - - -"AN UP-AND-COMING SOFTWARE COMPANY":There's no chance in hell we'll be the next Microsoft.- - - - -"PROFIT-SHARING PLAN":Once it's shared among the brass, you get what's left.- - - - -"COMPETITIVE SALARY:"We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.- - - - -"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY:"We have no time to train you. (and/or)Please introduce yourself to your co-workers.- - - - -"NATIONALLY RECOGNIZED LEADER:"Inc. Magazine mentioned us in an article a few years ago.- - - - -"IMMEDIATE OPENING:"The person who had this job gave notice a month ago.We're just now running the ad.- - - - -"SALES POSITION REQUIRING MOTIVATED SELF-STARTER:"We're can't supply you with leads; (and/or)there's no base salary to speak of; (and/or)you'll wait 30 days for your first commission check.- - - - -"SELF-MOTIVATED:"Don't expect Management to answer questions- - - - -"WE OFFER GREAT BENEFITS:"After 90 days, you can join our HMO, which has a $500 deductible and a $35 co-pay.

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