Pearly Gates Story - Heaven Jokes. Pearly Gates Story - Heaven Jokes. Clean Christian jokes, funny jokes, free jokes, and clean jokes and humor about Heaven, the Pearly Gates, St. Peter, eternity, and more. Enjoy a wide variety of funny Christian jokes, good clean jokes, and family safe jokes and religious humor. A man dies and goes to heaven. Of course, St. Peter meets him at the pearly gates. St. Peter says, "Here's how it works. You need 100 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all the good things you've done, and I