xxx Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    In order to punish your cat for poor behavior, here are a list of items that the cat may write on a chalkboard. A. Fill in the blanks1. [xxx] is not food. Dental floss, plants, Kleenex, toilet paper, human's homework, photographs, shoes, sweaters, socks, the couch, electrical cords/devices, phone cord, vases of flowers, my poop, electric wiring, the rubber fish toy my human drags around for me to play with; rubber bands; Mom's toe; the HUGE fly; used Q-tips; the other cat's vomited food. 2. I will not jump on the [xxx]. kitchen counter, table, stove, barbecue, my human's full bladder at 5: 30 A. M., bed at night, TV, bed from the top of the wardrobe at night. 3. I will not sharpen my claws on the [xxx]. sofa, carpet, drapes, my human's leg, my human's boss's leg, the new speakers, wallpaper, window screen, car tires. 4. I will not pee/poop/barf a hairball on the [xxx]. floor, carpet, sofa, clean laundry, sleeping human, human's tax return, the tax auditor, TV, baby's mattress, kitchen more...

    This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your dog when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an assignment. A. Fill in the blanks1. [xxx] is not food. Spiders; bandaids; ivy and airplane plants; Xmas ornaments; the carved jack-o-lantern; plants from the aquarium; cat litter box contents; laundry detergent boxes (esp. not when full!); toothpaste (tube and all); remote controls; linoleum; eyeglasses; books; stockings; the tar shingles on my house; chicken wire; bizarre plants; disposable razors; rocks; Lego; dirty Kleenex; the baby's used diaper; Christmas stockings; soda pop cans; fiberglass insulation stuffed up the chimney; the underwear in the clothes hamper; Mommy's hair accessories; Mommy's catnip teabags; unopened honey packets; staples; Christmas stockings; credit cards, CDs, and other thin plastic things. 2. I will not lift my leg to the [xxx]. Anything growing in the vegetable garden; house corner; new boyfriend; mailman; more...

    This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your dog when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an assignment. A. Fill in the blanks
    1. [xxx] is not food.
    Spiders; bandaids; ivy and airplane plants; Xmas ornaments; the carved jack-o-lantern; plants from the aquarium; cat litter box contents; laundry detergent boxes (esp. not when full!); toothpaste (tube and all); remote controls; linoleum; eyeglasses; books; stockings; the tar shingles on my house; chicken wire; bizarre plants; disposable razors; rocks; Lego; dirty Kleenex; the baby`s used diaper; Christmas stockings; soda pop cans; fiberglass insulation stuffed up the chimney; the underwear in the clothes hamper; Mommy`s hair accessories; Mommy`s catnip teabags; unopened honey packets; staples; Christmas stockings; credit cards, CDs, and other thin plastic things.
    2. I will not lift my leg to the [xxx].
    Anything growing in the vegetable garden; house corner; new more...

    This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your dog when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an assignment. A. Fill in the blanks
    1. [xxx] is not food.
    Spiders; bandaids; ivy and airplane plants; Xmas ornaments; the carvedjack-o-lantern; plants from the aquarium; cat litter box contents; laundrydetergent boxes (esp. not when full!); toothpaste (tube and all); remotecontrols; linoleum; eyeglasses; books; stockings; the tar shingles on myhouse; chicken wire; bizarre plants; disposable razors; rocks; Lego; dirtyKleenex; the baby's used diaper; Christmas stockings; soda pop cans; fiberglass insulation stuffed up the chimney; the underwear in the clotheshamper; Mommy's hair accessories; Mommy's catnip teabags; unopened honeypackets; staples; Christmas stockings; credit cards, CDs, andother thin plastic things.
    2. I will not lift my leg to the [xxx].
    Anything growing in the vegetable garden; house corner; new boyfriend; more...

    In order to punish your cat for poor behavior, here are a list of items that the cat may write on a chalkboard. A. Fill in the blanks
    1. [xxx] is not food.
    Dental floss, plants, Kleenex, toilet paper, human’s homework, photographs, shoes, sweaters, socks, the couch, electrical cords/devices, phone cord, vases of flowers, my poop, electric wiring, the rubber fish toy my human drags around for me to play with; rubber bands; Mom’s toe; the HUGE fly; used Q-tips; the other cat’s vomited food.
    2. I will not jump on the [xxx].
    kitchen counter, table, stove, barbecue, my human’s full bladder at 5: 30 A. M., bed at night, TV, bed from the top of the wardrobe at night.
    3. I will not sharpen my claws on the [xxx].
    sofa, carpet, drapes, my human’s leg, my human’s boss’s leg, the new speakers, wallpaper, window screen, car tires.
    4. I will not pee/poop/barf a hairball on the [xxx].
    floor, carpet, sofa, clean laundry, sleeping human, human’s more...

  • Recent Activity