"Dude, she just called - " "You know what? I don't care what she called me. I've moved on!" "No, dude, she just called you: 'You have one missed call'..." "..."
"Dude, she just called you short/gay/awkward/posh/hobo/geek/nerd/lazy/ninja!" "OH, HELL NO! Hold this machine which allows me to take the form of whatever sterotype that girl thinks of!"
"Dude, she just called you a geek!" "OH, HELL NO! Hold my bag, thermos flask, glasses case, protractor, scientific calculator, built-in GPS, time-machine, iPhone and name tag!"
"Dude, she just called you a nerd!" "OH, HELL NO!" "Well? Aren't you going to ask me to hold anything?" "No; I think it unwise to provoke the female who is so insistent to insult every predicament about my person/ Good day."