"thunder is just chuck norris farting ..." joke

Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn’t Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus’ birthday.

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!