"You can listen to thunder" joke
You can listen to thunder after lightening and tell how
close you came to getting hit.
If you don't hear it you got hit, so never mind.
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
Does a dolphin ever do something by accident? No, they do everything on porpoise!