"You are Given...." joke
A guy walks up to a doctor and asks: "What type of questions do you ask people to decide if they are retarded or not?" " I ask questions like;
If you had to empty a bathtub that was full of water, and I gave you a teaspoon, a bucket, and a cup, how would you get the water out?" "Oh I see," the man said, "A sensible man would use the bucket because it is bigger."
"No, a sensible person would pull the plug."
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
An Attorney was riding home in his limo and noticed two men sitting on the side of the road eating grass, he told his driver to stop and investigate.
His driver went to the two men and asked, sirs why are you eating grass? The first man replied, I have no money and must more...
The United Nations conducted a worldwide survey with one single question:
"Would you please give your opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"
The survey was a huge failure:
* In Latin America, they didn't more...