"Why to Date a Swimmer" joke
1. We are always clean.
2. We are totally comfortable saying, "I'll show you my breast if you show me your fly."
3. Bathing suits. Need I say more?
4. We WILL last the longest.
5. We know several different paces.
6. We LiKE it wet.
7. We will never hesitate to get on our backs.
8. We're good with our hips.
9. We never have any extra "baggage" in places where there isn't supposed to be any.
10. Not only do we put on latex fast and easy, but we go through enough of it in one year to cover our wallpaper with it.
11. We aren't always looking to "score" like all other athletes.
12. We don't "play games."
13. We go in hard, pull out fast, and come out wet.
14. We won't give up when we're tired.
15. Why would we want to play with balls???
16. We find it normal to jam a piece of styrafoam between our legs.
17. We dont like to wear pants.
18. We can hold our breath for long periods of time.
19. We usually get caught saying, "Are you _____? Because I'm so used to seeing you without clothes on."
20. Our daily apparel is held together by knots and is usually torn and see-through.
21. We are determined, strong, smart when it comes to math, and tough.
22. We find it perfectly normal to talk to people without clothes on.
23. We can be really independent, so we wont be clingy."
24. Every stroke is good for something different.
25. When doing free style you can do it longer or faster.
26. Backstroke: well apparently you can do it on your back and that takes skill.
27. Breast stroke: you do it frog style and that's always fun and you can also do it underwater; if you're game! lol
28. Butterfly is when you move your hips up and d own as fast as you can without stopping.
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!
Arnold Schwartzinagor has a long one
Michael J. Fox has a short one
Madonna doesn't have one and
Bill Clinton uses his a lot
What is "it"?
A last name!
Now what were you thinking?