"What a gynecologist does" joke
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one
look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He
immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began
to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?"
"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological
abnormalities."
"That is right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do
you know what I'm doing now?" he asked.
"Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer."
"Correct," replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounted his patient and
started having sexual intercourse with her.
He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
"Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes; which is why I came here in the
first place."
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
You know you're Taliban if...
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You own a 3000 quid machine gun and 5000 quid rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
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A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
Q: What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?
A: Their balls are just for decoration.