"Wedding Dress Blues" joke

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When my sister Andrea got married, she asked to wear my mother's wedding dress. The day she tried it on for the first time I was sitting with Mother in the living room as Andrea descended the stairs. The gown was a perfect fit on her petite frame. Mother's eyes welled with tears. I put my arm around her. "You're not losing a daughter," I reminded her in time-honored fashion. "You're gaining a son." "Oh, forget about that!" she said with a sob. "I used to fit into that dress!"

Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who has wronged you. If you think his window is closed and he can't hear you, it isn't and he can.

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