"The Meek will No Longer Inherit the Earth" joke

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Vatican Rescinds 'Blessed' Status of World's Meek- 'Screw the Meek,' Says Pope
VATICAN CITY-In a historic reversal of its nearly 2,000-year-old pro-meek stance, the Catholic Church announced Tuesday that it is permanently rescinding the traditional "blessed" status of the world's meek.
"Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ once said, 'Blessed are the meek,'" said Pope John Paul II in a papal bull read before the College of Cardinals. "However, there has always been a tacit understanding between the Church and the meek that this 'blessed' status was conditional upon their inheritance of the Earth, an event which seems unlikely to happen anytime in the foreseeable future. Our relationship, therefore, must be terminated."
"Screw the meek," the pope added.
Citing "two millennia of inaction and non-achievement" by the world's impoverished and downtrodden, the pope contended that the meek's historic inability to improve their worldly status constituted "bad faith" on their part.
"Twenty centuries should have been more than enough time for them to inherit the earth," the Supreme Pontiff said. "For years, the Catholic Church has made every effort to help them, but at some point, enough is enough. We are patient, but we are not saints."
Catholic leaders around the world were vocal in their support of the pope.
"The meek have abused their blessed status for far too long now," said Bernard Law, Archbishop of Boston. "From the Renaissance to the Industrial Revolution to the current Global Information Age, the meek have always somehow managed to sit back and do nothing while others worked hard to make advances and improve their lives. They have collected the Catholic Church's spiritual welfare checks for long enough."
"Everything about the meek, from their simple garments to their quiet demeanors to their utter lack of can-do spirit, goes against Church philosophy," Cardinal Jean-Claude Turcotte of Montr

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