"Swedish coal miners (adult)" joke

Hot 1 year ago

Two Swedish coal miners (Sven & Olaf) were down in the mine working. The noon whistle blew for lunch and Sven pulled out a thermos of hot coffee. Olaf looks at it and says, "Say, Sven, vat you got dere?"
Sven says, "Dis is a 2 quart termos bottle."
Olaf says, "Ya, I have to get me one."
That night Olaf goes home, but forgets what it is called. So the next day they are down in the mine working again and the noon whistle blows for lunch and Sven pulls out his thermos of hot coffee. Olaf looks at it and says, "Say, Sven, vat you got dere?"
Sven says, "Dis is a 2 quart termos bottle."
Olaf says, "Ya, I have to get me one."
That night Olaf goes home but forgets what it is called again. Well Olaf really wants one of these things. So he decides the next day when he asks he's going to write it down so he remembers what it is.
The next day they are down in the mine working again and the noon whistle blows for lunch and Sven pulls out his thermos of hot coffee. Olaf looks at it and says, "Say, Sven, vat you got dere?"
Well, by this time Sven is getting just a little bit pissed. Every day Olaf asks what it is and never remembers so he decides to just make up stuff since Olaf isn't going to remember anyway. So Sven says, "Dis is a contraceptive."
Olaf says, "Ya, I have to get me one." And he writes it down.
That night Olaf is in the neighborhood drug store and the pharmacist sees him walking around and says to him, "Can I help you?"
Olaf says, "Ya, I'd like a contraceptive."
And the pharmacist says, "Sure, what size?"
Olaf says, "Give me da 2 quart size, I'll be working in da hole all day!"

A local business was looking for office help and put up a sign saying: "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer."
A short time afterwards, a golden retriever dog trotted up to the more...

A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

Sven and Olie died and went to Hell. After awhile, the Devil came by to see how his new guests were doing. To his amazement, he found Sven and Olie were still wearing their winter gear and seemed to be quite comfortable. The Devil asked why they weren't hot.
Olie replied, more...

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The 60-year-old more...

Q.What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
A.We better get some support or people are going to think where nuts.

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