"Suicide" joke

Hot 1 year ago

A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park.
A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I'm hanging myself."
"You're supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist," said the onlooker. "I tried that," replied the blonde, "but I couldn't breathe."

"Mummy, Mummy. I was at the playground and Daddy..." Mummy tells him to slow down. She wants to hear the story, so Little Johnny tells her.
"I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving more...

Justin Williams told this joke on his Cajun Cooking show:
Two Cajuns, Rober' and Maurice, decided that hunting possums had gotten too dull, so they planned a trip to Canada to shoot moose. They flew in commercial planes all the way to Saskatoon, and from there, they hired a more...

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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Ya Mama

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

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Devon:Lol, that was just a saying that the one redhead and one bournette sent by gods african tribe and it's beyond crazy to that prehistoric scene that everyone jumped out and climbed up the nearest tree is part of the fatal rescue to run from the fire and guns cause there predators and cant see where the fake incidents lead to and tried laying down thescreaming tand wild gunman to poo the redhead and tribe caled 1-2-3 causing shamble cure masquline sword sorrows in savory prediction.
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autumn:Talk to me.
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autumn:I was just in a tornato.
Funny Joke? 68 vote(s). 79% are positive. 4 comment(s).