"Standing Before St. Peter" joke

A Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist pastor, along with their wives, were on a cruise. Suddenly a tidal wave came out of nowhere, swamped the ship and they all drowned. The next thing they knew, they were standing before St. Peter.
Shaking his head, St. Peter first looked at the Presbyterian and his wife and said, "You cannot enter for you loved money too much. So much so, that you married a woman named Penny."
St. Peter then turned to the Methodist and said, "I'm sorry for you cannot enter either. You loved food far too much. So much so that you married a woman named Candy."
Hearing this, the Baptist nervously turned to his wife and whispered, "It doesn't look good, Fanny."

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 Said, They, Wife, Woman, Religious, Peter, Married, Standing, Named, Cannot, Enter, Baptist, Loved, Presbyterian, Methodist

One day a little boy over heard his parents...

One day a little boy over heard his parents in the bedrooom arguing,"You bitch, your cunt is too hairy! Whell your dick is to small bastard!"The boy was curious about these new words so he went in the room and asked what they meant. The startled parents did their best more...

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St Patrick was gay

Three Englishmen were in a bar and spotted an Irishman.
So, one of the Englishmen walked over to the Irishman, tapped him on the shoulder, and said, "Hey, I hear your St. Patrick was a faggot."
"Oh really, hmm, didn't know that", replied the more...

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The faggot

What is the difference between a faggot and a refridgerator?
The fridge dont fart when you pull the meat out.

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Midget Faggot

Q: What is the difference between a regular faggot and a midget faggot?
A: Regulars come out of the closet; midgets come out of the cupboard.

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What did one faggot say to the other faggot at the gay bar?

Q: What did one faggot say to the other faggot at the gay bar?
A: Can I push your stool in?

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Louise:A man walked into the ladies clothing store and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, “I’d like to buy a bra for my wife.” “What type of bra?” asked the clerk. “Type?” inquires the man, “There’s more than one type?” “Look around” said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color, and material imaginable. Actually even with all this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from. Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied, “There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?” Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The saleslady responded, “It is all really quite simple.” The Catholic type supports the masses, The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen, The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and The Baptist makes mountains out of molehills. Now, have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn’t figure out what the letters stood for, well it’s about time you became informed. A - - Almost boobs B - - Barely there C - - Can’t complain D - - Dang DD - Double Dang E - - Enormous F - - Fake G - - Get a reduction H - - Help me, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up! And don’t forget the German bra: Holtzemfromfloppen
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Louise:Don't forget the German bra: Holtzemfromfloppen
Funny Joke? 11 vote(s). 82% are positive. 2 comment(s).