"Spell Ice Cream" joke
This little old lady walks into an ice cream parlor and asks for 2 scoops of chocolate ice cream. The man behind the counter says 'I'm sorry, we are all out of chocolate ice cream'.The lady says 'OK, I'll take one scoop of chocolate ice cream in a cup.'The man says 'Ma-am, we are all out of chocolate'.The little old lady says 'OK, then I'll have a single scoop of chocolate in a cone'.The man, a little more irritated this time says 'Ok, lady. Spell van as in vanilla'.The lady says V A NThe man says, 'OK, spell straw as in strawberry'.The lady says S T R A W.The man says, 'OK, now spell fuck as in chocolate'.The lady says there ain't no fuck in chocolate.The man says, 'Lady, that's what I've been trying to tell you all along!
Three golfing partners died in a car wreck and went to heaven.
Upon arrival they discover the most beautiful golf course they have ever seen.
St. Peter tells them that they are all welcome to play the course, but he cautions them that there is only one more...
The first day of school was going good for the new teacher and in an attempt to "break the ice" with the little second graders, she began to ask each student what their fathers did for a living.
"Mary, what does your father do?" asked the more...
A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. We have only canned and dry goods."
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh more...