"Sometimes too much to drink" joke
Sometimes too much to drink is not enough.
Q: What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?
A: Their balls are just for decoration.
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...
Teacher: Wat do u call a person who apologizes if he has committed a mistake ?
Boy: An honest man.
Teacher: Good. And what do u call a person who apologizes even if he has committed no mistake ?
Boy: A Boyfriend.