"Sex with Patients (adult)" joke
A guy comes home from work feeling bad about the day's activities. He lays down on the couch and ponders his actions. Like most of us, his conscience has two voices; that of his good moral side and that of his mischievious side.
While staring at the ceiling, a voice in his head says "don't worry about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." The man tosses and turns in reflection of his actions. Again the voice says "don't worry about it, a lot of doctors have sex with their patients." Feeling somewhat relieved, the man begins to relax and feel better about himself at which time another voice in head says, "but you're a veterinarian."
In biology class the teacher asks, "Can anyone tell me why a flounder is flat?" Little Johnny raises his hand.
"Go ahead, Little Johnny."
"My uncle told me it's because a whale raped the flounder."
"That's terrible, Little Johnny. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you saying: "Damn that was fun!"
Q. Why did the belt go to jail? A. Because he held up a pair of pants!
Mike Tyson gets out of jail and proceeds to do what he does best... find a woman with whom he may "commiserate". After a wild night of getting it on, it's time for the young lady to leave. As she's getting dressed, she and Mike are having a conversation. She says, more...