"Products we could do without!" joke

Fingernail Clippers:
That's why we have teeth.
Makeup That is Tattooed on:
You might love that green eyeliner now, but what about when you're fifty?
Colored Elastics For Braces:
As if the braces didn't make your mouth stand out enough.
Inflatable Furniture:
Nothing boosts the ego more than sitting on a couch and popping it.
Crayons That Smell:
Oh, good, let's give kids another reason to eat them.
Fake Eyelashes:
You shouldn't be able to braid your eyelashes.
The Epilady:
Pulling hair out by the roots is masochistic.
Those Crocheted Kleenex Box Covers:
Kleenex does not get chilly.
Rubber Clothing:
Because you shouldn't bounce if you fall down the stairs.
Doggie Sweaters:
Fido is not Mr. Rogers, nor does he want to be Mr. Rogers.
Thong underwear:
Nothing leads to insanity faster than a perpetual wedgie.