"Preacher Stops Gambling" joke
An old preacher was just getting out of church and was driving home through his neighborhood. As he was turning the corner of one of the major streets in his neighborhood, he noticed 3 boys playing dice on the sidewalk, and betting money along with it. The old preacher thinks to himself how awful the situation is, that these young children are already heading down the life of sin and he should do something to stop it.
The old preacher pulls over and gets out on the opposite side of the street and starts walking over to the boys. He calls out to the oldest looking on and asked the boy to "come here" so that as he's walking towards the boys, the oldest boy would be walking toward him. When the boy reached him, the old preacher asked him what he was doing.
"Gambling, sir" retorted the boy
"Gambling?! How old are you son?" asked the preacher.
"14?! Well if you turn that around, you'll be 41. You'll have reached the middle years of your life, and if you stick to gambling in all that time, you'll have thrown your whole life away. You could have been married, had a successful job, kids, a home, a family, but no. You'll have thought gambling was such a "good life." Is that what you want? Did you want to live your life through sin and banished from God's grace?"
"N-n-o sir!" wailed the boy.
"Good lad. Now head on home son. The lord is smiling to find out you've said no to sin" the old preacher smiled as the boy went his way down the street.
He looked back at the other 2 boys and realized they were still shooting dice. He calls back to the next oldest looking boy and asked him to come closer.
"You boy, how old are you son?" questioned the preacher.
"I'm 12, sir" answered the boy.
"12?! Well now lookie here boy. If you turned that around, you'll be 21. You'll have been at the prime of your life. You'll be halfway through college, seeing a very lovely young lady, talking about starting a family with you. All these big decisions you'll be facing, and you'll have the heart to make them but not if you continue down this destructive gambling path. The colleges will turn down your application because your credit will be bad, and your young lovely lady friend will leave you because you just cant seem to get your finances in order due to this overwhelming problem of yours. On top of everything the Mighty Lord will be frowning upon your conduct and your choice to live the life of sin. Leave this world behind son. It starts now. Now go on home son! Make the lord proud of you, for his warm smile will be all the coercing you need to leave this life behind."
"Y-y-yes sir!" said the boy, and he went the opposite way down the street towards his home.
The preacher thought his work was done for surely the final boy must have heard his words being said to his friend, but sure enough, when the preacher looked back, there he was, still shooting dice and gambling.
"I don't believe this!" he muttered. "You boy, come here a second!"
The other boy walked casually toward the preacher.
"How old are you son? Let me show you why this gambling life is a bad choice for you."
"Good mister, cause i'm 11. I'd much like to hear it!"
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