"Phony Names" joke

Hot 3 years ago

Here's a list of phony names often given to substitute teachers:
(source: "Book of Lists 2")
Anne Chovy
Art E. Choke
Bud Wiser
Frank Furter
Chuck Waggon
Jim Shoo
Sandy Beach
Polly Gon
Ben Gay
Liz Onya
Ben Dover
Eileen Dover
Barb DeWyre

An MG Midget pulled alongside a Rolls-Royce at a traffic light. "Do you have a car phone?" its driver asked the guy in the Rolls.

"Of course I do," replied the haughty deluxe-car driver.

"Well, do you have a fax more...

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Grumpy

Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep.

A guy walks into a bar and orders twelve shots of Tequila to be set in front of him. When the bartender is done he proceeds to shoot all twelve in a row.
When he sets the last glass done with a heavy sigh, the bartender asks him what that was all about, he replies he was more...

Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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