"Penis and the Windsheild" joke

Hot 1 year ago

A couple are driving along the freeway and the husband, who is driving, is complaining about everything... the heat, the long drive, the bad drivers, the country, etc... and his wife is getting tired of his depressing talk. So she says to him: "One more complaint and I'll cut your penis off with my pen-knife".
About half an hour later, he starts complaining again, and before he could blink his wife pulls out her knife, slices the guy's dick off, and throws it out the window.
Driving behind the couple's car is a family of three: husband, wife, and a 8 year old daughter. The penis lands on their car's windshield, and the father, in an absolute panic (as he doesn't want his daughter to see the penis), quickly turns on the windshield wipers (to get the dick off the windshield, and out of view of his daughter).
The observant daughter asks: "Daddy, what was that?"
Her father, still in a panic, says, "Oh it was only a... uh... butterfly".
"Must've been a big butterfly," replied the daughter...
"Did you see the size of it's dick!

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife:

"Dear Husband, I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?"

The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a more...

I do ten sit ups every morning. It might not sound like much, but there are only so many times you can hit the snooze button.

A little boy goes up to his father and asks: "Dad, what's the difference between hypothetical and reality?"
The father replies: "Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your more...

I've been fucking this really sexy bird who is a twin.
My mate asked me how I told her apart from the other twin?
I said it was easy. Her brother has a beard.

Add a comment
remember me
follow replies
0
0
(0)
husla:damn guess sh is no longer a kid
Funny Joke? 35 vote(s). 77% are positive. 1 comment(s).