This couple had an excellent relationship going until one day he came home from work to find his girlfriend packing. He asked her why she was leaving him and she told him that she had heard awful things about him.
"What could they possibly have said to make you move out?"
"They told me that you were a pedophile."
He replied, "That's an awfully big word for a ten year old."
One day a cucumber, pickle and a penis were having a conversation.
The Pickle says, "You know, my life really sucks. Whenever I get big fat and juicy they sprinkle seasonings on my and stick me in a jar.
The Cucumber says, "Yeah, you think that's bad? Whenever more...
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
A pedophile and a young boy are walking through a dark forest when the boy says "It's getting dark and I'm scared" when the pedophile says "You're scared, I gotta walk outta here by myself!"