"Pass Me" joke
They were three guys dining with their wives, a Chinese, a Portuguese and a Hawaiian. During dinner the Chinese said to his wife, "Pass the sugar, Sugar." Proudly she did while the other wives looked enviously. Later, the Portuguese said to his wife, "Pass the honey, Honey." She too was proud of the gesture. Trying to out do the other men, the Hawaiian thought for a moment and suddenly looked to his wife and said, "Pass the Kalua, Pig."
OK, You're a woman, walking home alone. You suddenly notice you are being followed by a black man. What steps would you take?
Fucking long ones!
My wife has just found out I've been fucking a Hermaphrodite.
She screamed at me, "What's she got that I haven't got?"
I once fingered my daughter to the police.
I think it was every breath you take.