"Parents Worst Nightmare" joke
& father passing by his son`s bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands. Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I`m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I`ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it`s not only the passion, Dad. She`s pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana cocaine doesn` t really hurt anyone. We`ll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we`ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!! Don`t worry Dad, I`m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I`m sure we`ll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren. Love, your son,
Johnny P. S. Dad, none of the above is true. I`m over at, my friend, Tommy`s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that`s on my desk. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
The Utah Jazz collected their 12th straight victory. In celebration, Utah residents might even stay up til midnight.
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...