"Outrageous Flirting Lines" joke

Outrageous Flirting Lines
You can't be real. May I pinch you to see if I'm dreaming? Hey, didn't we go to different high schools? There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. At last! I finally found the perfect girl! A fool and his money are soon my boyfriend. Do your legs hurt from running in my dreams all night? Is it hot in here or is it just you? If I follow you home, will you keep me? The best way to hold a man is in your arms. If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? If love is the answer...can you repeat the question? I'm writing a telephone book. May I have your number? Flattery will get you everywhere! Keep talking. I know I'm not Mr. Right, but would you settle for Mr. Right Now? But you're so *cute* when you blush! All those curves, and me with no brakes. I don't approve of your objectives, but I love your methods. Please be patient-this is my first time. May we kiss those we please, and please those we kiss. Bits make bytes, but nibbles turn me on. Nothing says "I love you" better than six hours of nonstop sex. A person can be poor at history, but great on dates. A curved line is the loveliest distance between two points. I only like two kinds of girls-domestic and imported. If only women came with pull-down menus and on-line help! I can read you like a book, but I keep forgetting my place. Didn't I meet you in some other hallucination? Be good and you'll be lonely. The best things in life are ME! I just naturally respect pretty girls in tight-fitting sweaters. I used to be a terrible flirt. I'm much better at it now. I don't dance. But I'd love to hold you while you do. Clothes aren't sexy. Women are. I can't whistle at my girlfriend...she leaves me breathless! Any man who can see through women is sure missing a lot. I feel great! And I don't kiss badly either!

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