"Others Before Me?" joke
The morning after an all-night honeymoon extravaganza in bed, the newlywed wife snuggles up to her hubby and asks, "Sweetheart, how many others were there before me?
"After a few minutes of silence, the wife says, "Well, I'm waiting."
And the guy takes a deep breath and says, "Well, I'm still counting."
Tips for Moving South...Yee-Haw!
1. Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how to use it.
2. If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Bubba". You have a 75% chance of being right.
3. Just because you can drive on more...
Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...
Your moma is like a brick dirty on both sides and laid by mexicans.
your mamma is so fat when she steps on the scales it says one at a time please.
Your momma is so fat when you tell her she has something on her chin she asks which one