"Obsession With Sex" joke
A man visits a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, I think I have an obsession with sex. Can you help me?"
The doctor agrees to examine him and begins by showing him various drawings. First, the doctor draws a square and asks the man to identify it.
"OH MY! Four people having sex!" exclaims the man.
Next, the doctor draws a circle. The man gasps and says, "One man having sex."
The doctor then draws a triangle. The man looks at the drawing and says, "Two women and one man having sex."
The doctor puts the drawings away and says, "I agree. You do seem to have an obsession with sex."
"ME??? YOU'RE the one who's drawing all the dirty pictures!" the man replies.
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
Scientists have invented, at the cost of $75 million in research, a robot that repels eyeliner, lipstick & mascara.
You couldn't make it up!
A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.