"Nursing Home Inhabitants (suggestive)" joke

Hot 5 years ago

Jim Goldman's joke reminded me of an oldie but goodie:
Fred and Myra were residents at the local old age home. One day, Fred came shuffling past Myra when she waved him over.
"Fred," she said, "I'll bet I can guess how old you are."
"Okay," replied Fred, "go ahead. Tell me how old I am."
Well, you got to pull down your pants first Fred.
"What are ya talkin' about Myra?"
"I can only tell how old you are if you pull down your pants Fred."
Shrugging his shoulders, Fred obliges and pulls down his pants. Myra tells him to pull down his underpants as well.
Thinking 'why not?' he pulls down his underpants as well. Myra peers at his privates, inspecting from all angles. She takes his equipment in hand, moves it around a bit, feeling here and there. After some of this manipulation, she looks up at Fred and announces, "You're 87 years old."
Astonished, Fred looks at her in amazement!
"How did you figure that out Myra?!?!?"
"Fred - you told me yesterday."

A Newfie was going to Toronto on the Airplane and started talking
to an Mainlander.
Newfie: Lord Tundrin' Geeses Bye, What do you do for a livin'?
Mainlander: Well, I'm a Psychoanalyst.
Newfie: Psychoanalyst, What the Heck is that?
Mainlander: It's hard to more...

Did you hear about the missionary that gave some cannibals their first taste of religion?

A black guy and a puerto rican guy are both in a car...who's driving?
A Cop!!!

Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey... My Love... Darling... Sweetheart... Pumpkin, etc.Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all more...

A redneck couple had lived together in the backwoods for over fifty years. To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, the man took her to a large city and they checked into a plush hotel.
The woman said to the bellman, "We refuse to settle for such a small room. No more...

Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 2 vote(s). 100% are positive. 0 comment(s).