"Nowlan's Theory: He who" joke

Hot 2 years ago

Nowlan's Theory: He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the next freeway exit.

A man joins a monastery and although he takes a vow of silence, he is permitted to say two words every seven years.
After the first seven years have past, the elders bring him in and ask him for his two words.
"Cold floors," he says. The elders nod and send him more...

A little boy goes up to his father and asks: "Dad, what's the difference between hypothetical and reality?"
The father replies: "Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your more...

A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park.
A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I'm hanging myself."
"You're supposed more...

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again

I farted in an elevator yesterday... it was wrong on so many levels.

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