"Novice hunter" joke
A young man from the city went to visit his farmer uncle. For the first few days, the uncle showed him the usual things - chickens, cows, crops, etc. After three days, however, it was obvious that the nephew was getting bored, and the uncle was running out of things to amuse him with.
Finally, the uncle had an idea. "Why don't you grab a gun, take the dogs, and go shooting?"
This seemed to cheer the nephew up, and with enthusiasm, off he went, dogs in trail. After a few hours, the nephew returned.
"How did you enjoy that?" asked the uncle.
"It was great!" exclaimed the nephew. "Got any more dogs?"
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!
Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!