"Not Jewish" joke
A meshulach comes knocking on a very wealthy person's door and when the owner of the house answers, the meshulach greets him, "Sholom Aleichem, Mr. Goldstein. I'm collecting for the Lotsa Gelt Yeshivah, and I'm wondering if a nice wealthy Jewish person like yourself wouldn't want to make a little contribution."
The homeowner replies, "The name is Gold, not Goldstein, and I am not Jewish."
"Are you sure?", asks the Meshulach.
"Sir, I'm positive", replies the homeowner.
"But", says the meshulach, "It says here that you're Jewish, and my records are never wrong."
"I can assure you that I am certainly not Jewish", replies the homeowner, getting more impatient.
"Look sir, I know that my records are never wrong. You must be kidding me. Are you sure you aren't Jewish?" demands the Meshulach.
"For the last time sir, I am not Jewish, my father is not Jewish, and my grandfather, alav hashalom, wasn't Jewish either!"
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