"New Bra" joke

Hot 1 month ago

A scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in.

At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took the scientist outside and kicked the crap out of him.

A middle-aged woman looks in the mirror.
"God, I look old, fat and ugly," she says to her hubby. "Pay me a compliment, dear."
Her hubby says, "Your fucking eyesight's good!"

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

I wanted to get a dog for my son. But the pet shop doesn't do swaps.

My wife has just found out I've been fucking a Hermaphrodite.
She screamed at me, "What's she got that I haven't got?"

What do you get when you cross a rooster with an owl?
A cock that stays up all night.

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