"New Bra" joke

A scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in.

At a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took the scientist outside and kicked the crap out of him.

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church.

The pastor said,' We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.'

The couples agreed and came more...

Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters." So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you more...

Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...

My wife has just found out I've been fucking a Hermaphrodite.
She screamed at me, "What's she got that I haven't got?"
"Well....."

My mate told me yesterday that he had seen his doctor and been told he had to give up sex or he will die.
I said, "Why, mate?"
He said, "I've been fucking his wife."

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