"Men vs parking spaces" joke
Q: Why are men and parking spaces alike?
A: Because all the good ones are gone and the only ones left are disabled.
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...
Teacher: Wat do u call a person who apologizes if he has committed a mistake ?
Boy: An honest man.
Teacher: Good. And what do u call a person who apologizes even if he has committed no mistake ?
Boy: A Boyfriend.