"Marriage proposal..." joke
My girlfriend asked, "Do you want to get married?"
I said, "Sure."
She said, "Great, when?"
I said, "Well like every other guy, when I meet the right girl."
Why don't vegetarian women scream during orgasms?
They refuse to admit that a piece of meat gives them pleasure!
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game of the season. At the start of the game the pitcher comes up in the stands and whispers something in Clinton's ear.
All of a sudden Clinton looks at Hillary and yells, "Okay, Hillary, GET OUT!".
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.