"Marriage proposal..." joke
My girlfriend asked, "Do you want to get married?"
I said, "Sure."
She said, "Great, when?"
I said, "Well like every other guy, when I meet the right girl."
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
A little boy hurts his finger, runs in the house, and calls out to his mother. "Oh," she says, "let me get a band-aid for that."
"No!" cries the boy, "Cider!"
"Cider?" the mother exclaims. "What on earth do you more...
Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...