"Lust, Love or Marriage?" joke
For those of you who question whether you are in love, in lust, or really married, the following descriptions may help to clear things up.
Love - When intercourse is called - making love.
Lust - When intercourse is called - screwing.
Marriage - What's intercourse?
Love - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
Lust - When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
Marriage - When you lose your child in a crowded room.
Love - When you share everything you own.
Lust - When you steal everything they own.
Marriage - When the bank owns everything.
Love - When it doesn't matter if you don't reach a climax.
Lust - When the relationship ends if you don't reach a climax.
Marriage - What's a climax?
Love - When you phone each other just to say Hi.
Lust - When you phone each other to choose a hotel room.
Marriage - When you phone each other to bitch.
Love - When you write poems about your partner.
Lust - When all you write is your phone number.
Marriage - When all your write is checks.
Love - When you show concern for your partner's feelings.
Lust - When you couldn't give a shit.
Marriage - When your only concern is what's on TV.
Love - When your farewell is "I love you, darling... "
Lust - When your farewell is "Same time next week?"
Marriage - When your farewell is a relief.
Love - When your heart flutters every time you see them.
Lust - When your groin twitches every time you see them.
Marriage - When your wallet empties every time you see them.
Love - When nobody else matters.
Lust - When nobody else knows.
Marriage - When everybody else matters and you don't care who knows.
Love - When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
Lust - When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
Marriage - When you listen to talk radio.
Love - When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
Lust - When staying together is something you try not to think about.
Marriage - When just getting through the day is your only thought.
Love - When you're only interested in doing things WITH your partner.
Lust - When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
Marriage - When you're only interested in your golf score.
One day a little boy over heard his parents in the bedrooom arguing,"You bitch, your cunt is too hairy! Whell your dick is to small bastard!"The boy was curious about these new words so he went in the room and asked what they meant. The startled parents did their best more...
Three Englishmen were in a bar and spotted an Irishman.
So, one of the Englishmen walked over to the Irishman, tapped him on the shoulder, and said, "Hey, I hear your St. Patrick was a faggot."
"Oh really, hmm, didn't know that", replied the more...
What is the difference between a faggot and a refridgerator?
The fridge dont fart when you pull the meat out.
Q: What is the difference between a regular faggot and a midget faggot?
A: Regulars come out of the closet; midgets come out of the cupboard.
Q: What did one faggot say to the other faggot at the gay bar?
A: Can I push your stool in?