"Just in time for Xmas!" joke

Hot 4 months ago

New, from Mattel...!
[ANNOUNCER]
New MIGHTY-MORPHIN'-JESUS action figures!
With realistic healing and smiting action!
[VOICE OVER]
[child #1]
"Aaannggg... Oh no! G.I. Joe is hit... Cobra leader is
getting away!"
[whirring sound... Mighty-Morphin-Jesus' eyes light and head spins]
[child #1 in Jesus voice]
"You are healed my son... now go forth and kick some ass."
[child #2 in G.I. Joe voice]
"Thanks J-man., Let's go Joes!"
[ANNOUNCER]
Now you're in control... fight the forces of evil with new
Mighty-Morphin-Jesus the action figure.
[Action shot of Jesus figure and He-Man battling Skeletor]
He's back from the dead and he's pissed.
[VOICE OVER]
[child #2 in Skeletor voice]
"So Jesus, we meet again... will you never learn that evil
is stronger than good?"
[child #1 in Jesus voice]
"That may be, my unholy friend, but I know something even stronger!"
[Jesus figure transforms into dinosaur]
[child #2 in Skeletor voice]
"No!... Jesusaurus!"
[Dinosaur tramples Skeletor and than transforms back into Jesus figure]
[ANNOUNCER]
Mighty-Morphin'-Jesus transforms into Dino-Jesus and back with just a twist!
Secret panel in Jesus' back holds water, manna, and grappling hook.
(sold separately)
Batteries not necessary.
Also available, new Mighty-Morphin'-Moses and friends.
Collect them all!

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